Is there a time you wanted to get better at something, tried for a while, but eventually progress sputtered out? This pattern of behavior is no different when it comes to allyship. When something breaks in front of us, we often search to find immediate fixes for the problem. But in the case of equity and inclusion, there is no checklist or short cut that can piece together all the gaps. Removing barriers can be complex and time consuming, which requires a different mindset than achieving “quick wins.”
A common pitfall allies stumble into, is underestimating the dedication it takes to think and act differently than they’ve been socialized. Similar to lowering cholesterol, learning a foreign language, or playing a new instrument, activating allyship is a long-term lifestyle change requiring on-going commitment and nurturing. If you stop working at it your progress will eventually slip away, and for that reason allyship often cycles. To avoid short spurts of action, continuously acknowledge allyship as the significant behavior altering goal it is.
Another challenge to staying the course, is being prepared for burnout. Though on the surface inclusion is fluffy, once you start to tug the string of truth, waves of emotions often result in overwhelm. To prepare for those strong reactions, go into allyship open to the notion that equity work requires vulnerability, discomfort and questioning our perception. Doing the right thing is rarely the most convenient, so above all, take time to address how to maintain allyship and self-care simultaneously.
Accountability, the secret ingredient to sustaining nearly anything, needs foresight and attention too. The degree to which one dismantles social injustice is essentially up to them, and them alone. Yet at the same time, an effective ally challenges everyone around them to a higher degree of social responsibility. To help folks be accountable to that raised bar, we must be accountable to it first. To do so, we have to be willing to keep score on ourselves, be honest about it, and find ways to ally even when no one is watching.
There are many challenges that can hinder equity and inclusion work, but if acknowledged and planned for, they can be speed bumps instead of roadblocks. By embracing the inevitable you can defy the primary reasons allyship gets halted in its tracks and carry on connecting and building community one conversation at a time.
Call to action
Make allyship a habit instead of a hobby by finding a way to roll action into your everyday.
Ensure you are using true self-care methods such as meditation, journaling or other ways to help you remain centered.
Make a milestone schedule for your goals. Though allyship isn’t a perfect science, if it doesn’t stay top of mind, you won’t improve.